Sincerenity

Last week was, for lack of bettter words, the worst week of my weight loss so far.

I usually try to stay away from words like “good” or “bad” when it comes to weight loss. However, last week was not…. great.

“If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail.”

Benjamin Franklin

It all started when I was unable to prep all of my meals for the week. I meal prep my breakfasts and lunches for the week ahead of time, so I can just grab and go in the mornings. Because of a family gathering and a broken dishwasher-fiasco, I did not have time to meal prep.

I could have woken up a little earlier and made my meals in the mornings, but I didn’t. I could have done it after work, but I didn’t. This led to a slippery slope of not keeping to my other habits I had incorporated into my life. I didn’t track my calories or anything that I ate, hardly drank any water and due to lack of meal prep and planning, I ate junk food every day. I hadn’t worked out in almost two weeks.

For months, I had incorporated many new habits into my life. I did not realize how much they were helping me until I stopped doing them for a week. Because I wasn’t working out at all, I had all this nervous energy tht had no where to go. My anxiety hasn’t been that bad in a long time. Because I wasn’t eating the food that I had routinely eaten for nutrition, energy, satiation and caloric deficit, I physically felt ill and my stomach hurt so bad.

I haven’t felt that bad – emotionally, physically and mentally – in a long time. The worst part was: I used to live and feel like that every day. How did I do that?

I’m not entirely upset about my off-week. I was really beating myself up about it, thinking about how much progress I lost. But then I realized, I’m actually incredibly grateful for this failure.

Failure is a tough word. Yes, I failed. I had a routine and specific rules for myself and I was unsuccessful at sticking to my plan last week. Yes, I failed. There’s nothing I can do to change that, though. It happened, so I can either sit here and beat myself up about it, or I can take this failure and get value from it.

Last week’s failure is incredibly valuable to me. It showed me that what I was doing really was working. It showed me that I was making right decisions. It’s hard to see how far you’ve come sometimes.

It made it easier to get back on track and to keep going. It made it easier to keep going. This was the push I needed.

Now that I’ve seen firsthand what it’s like to live without my goals and routines, I don’t want to live without them.